I Am
by Crazy Hyper Gleek
Summary: I am the daughter who has always tried the hardest but that has never been good enough. I am the girl whose mom got sick of her and sent her away. I am the best big sister in the world. My name is Isabella Sawn and this is me.
1. I Am

_**I Am**_

Chapter One: I Am

I am the daughter who has always tried the hardest but that has never been good enough.

I am the big sister who was so proud that she wore her "I'm the big sister' shirt for a week straight.

I am the girl who watched her parents fight when they thought she couldn't see.

I am the child who had to grow up to soon because she had to take care of her family.

So many different ways to describe me.

I am the girl whose mom got sick of her and sent her away.

I am the girl who is new.

I am the one who lies awake at night listening to thunder with a smile.

I am the one who has no one to turn to.

So many different me's.

I am the child that never cried because she had to be strong.

I am the daughter who hugged her mother as she cried.

I am the girl in love with music.

I am the klutzy girl walking in front of you.

Which is really me?

I am the girl who is confused but has no one to talk to.

I am the one who has no idea what she wants to do with her life.

I am the best big sister in the world.

I am the girl who has never really known her dad.

Are they all me?

I am the girl being sent to live with her father.

I am the girl being separated from her baby sister.

I am the straight A student.

I am.

I am Isabella Marie Swan and this is me.

A/N: Okay, so I haven't updated Guardian Angel in a week, but I really wanted to write this. It's going to be All Human and AU as well, just so you know. Yay! Review!


	2. The Unloved Daughter

_**I Am**_

**I Am The Unloved Daughter**

I plug my headphones into my ears, turning it up to blaring to drown out my ditzy mothers' idiotic chatter. I tap out the beat on the back of the seat in front of me. For a few seconds I am in Heaven before my world once more came crashing down around me as my step father, Phil, reaches behind him and rips the headphones out of my ears.

"Bitch, don't you know better than to ignore your mother? She was speaking to you, you little snot nosed brat." Phil sneers as he rolls the headphones around my iPod Classic that I had spent months saving for before tucking it in his pocket. I almost say something before deciding it just isn't worth it. I'll get it back latter.

"What did you say mother? I'm sorry; I didn't realize you were talking to me." I say in a sugary sweet voice. Renee just flashes me a smile and continues rambling, unconcerned over the fact that her husband has just called her daughter a bitch. I roll my eyes. Typical Renee.

"It is so wonderful that you have decided to spend some quality time with Charlie." Renee gushes as she swerves back out of the way of oncoming traffic. I snort. Ha! Yeah right! Decided my ass. If by "deciding to spend time" with Charlie she means she sending her husband in to pummel me until I was on the brink of death and swore not to take my sister, Lola, with me, then, yeah, she's right. It's not that I am surprised or even upset. My mother has always hated me. I look and act to much like Charlie, my father, who I have never really known. Honestly, I would have run away years ago, if it wasn't for Lola.

Ah, yes, Lola. My perfect, wonderful, amazing little sister. I have always thanked whatever deity may exist for blessing Lola with my Aunt Mary's looks. Beautiful, short blonde curls, heart shaped face, high cheek bones. Crystal blue eyes. My mother has always loved Lola, and doesn't let Phil beat the shit out of her like she lets him do to me. Thank god. Lola is too delicate; she would never be able to take it.

As we pulled up at the airport, Lola got out of the car while Phil and Renee busied themselves in the front seat.

"Are you sure you want to go?" Lola asks her bottom lip trembling. I nod and smile, trying to keep a brave face for my 14 year old sister. "And I can't come?" I shake my head. "WHY?!" Lola is now whining.

"Because you and I both know that you would hate Washington. It rains ALL the time there, especially in Forks." I lie, though it breaks my heart.

"And you wont hate it? Bella, you love the sun!" Lola screamed as she wrapped her arms around me.

"I'll be fine sweetheart. Don't worry about me. You'll be fine here with Mom and Phil." I whisper as I kiss her on the forehead. "Now go get back in the car." She seemed to think about it for a moment before she nodded and complied. I walked up to the open window where my mother was sitting in the passenger seat.

"You'll have to forgive me for not getting out of the car, I have the worst headache." Renee purred, looking over the top of her cheap gas station sunglasses with a look of disdain.

"It's fine mother, I understand. Just… could you ask Phil to give me back my iPod?" I pleaded, hoping that she would ask me to stay. Tell me she loved me. Anything. But she didn't. She just handed over the iPod with a tight lipped smile.

"Well, we have to run. Toddles." I look up just in time to mouth 'I love you' to my little sister before they speed away. And that is the last time I will see my sister… maybe ever. For sure until we are both 18. A tear finds its way down my cheek as I trudge towards the long line that has already begun to form at the ungodly hour of the morning.

_I am the unloved daughter._

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_A/N: Extremly short chapter, but I haven't had a computer for a while. BUT, I have FIVE chapters written, I just have to type them up. But, I wanted to get this out. I should be updating a new chapter everyday for the rest of the week... no promises though. Reviews are appriciated and beta's accepted._


	3. The Daughter Who Has Never KnownFather

_**I Am**_

**I Am The Daughter That Has Never Really Known Her Father**

The plane ride was long and torturous. I hated leaving Lola behind, not being able to take care of her. I was leaving the people who hated me and moving in with someone I barley know. I was laving the only home I have ever known. I was leaving behind the few friends that I had had. And I hated myself for being relieved.

* * *

Latter that afternoon, I arrived in Seattle, completely confused on how this was going to work. Would Charlie be there waiting for me? Was I supposed to catch a cab? My confusion was cleared up as I stepped out of the terminal to see a shy, middle aged, kind, balding man in a police uniform standing there awkwardly, obviously waiting for someone. Me.

"Dad." I said as I walked up to Charlie. He looked relieved as he awkwardly wrapped his arms around me.

"I missed you kiddo." I nodded and buried my head into his chest. This was… weird. I wasn't normally a touchy felly or emotional person, and I know I had gotten that from Charlie. But, it felt so good to finally be around someone who loved me that I found myself hanging on to Charlie for dear life.

"Missed you to Dad." I mumbled. I hadn't seen Charlie since Mom and Phil had started dating and he had insisted I stop seeing Charlie. Charlie could do nothing, and only watch as I and my sister slipped from his fingers just as Renee had. Pulling back, Charlie noticed the bruise on my cheek.

"Bells, where did you get this?" Charlie demanded, suspicion forming in his eyes.

"Dad, don't worry about it. You know how klutzy I am." I lied. But, I had never been good at lying and Charlie was a cop. He saw through my lie almost instantly.

"Isabella Marie, I asked you how you got this. Don't lie to me. It was Phil wasn't it? Damn it! I always knew there was something wrong with that guy. And you just left Lola there?! Bells, how could you?" Charlie ranted, panic clear in his eyes. Of course he had jumped to the worst, and right, answer right away. That was just how Charlie was.

"Dad, calm down. Lola is perfectly fine. If she wasn't, I wouldn't have left her. Do you think I could leave my sister in harm? Just, drop it." Charlie looked like he was going to argue, so I changed the subject "Let's go get my baggage." I saw the defeat in Charlie's eyes and gave an internal sigh of relief.

"Okay. Lets go."

The ride home could be described as nothing but awkward, which was a word that I seemed to be using a lot. Both Charlie and I are shy, so the silence was long, broken here and there by polite pleasantries. The fact that we had nothing to talk about only showed to remind me that I didn't really know my father.

As we were driving through the streets of my new town, I was so busy staring out the window, I didn't hear what Charlie had said and I had to ask him to repeat it.

"I said that I have a surprise for you at home. I figured you wouldn't want to be driving around in the cruiser, so I talked to your sister, and she said you'd like it…" we pulled around the corner and I let out a delighted laugh. Sitting on the curb in front of Charlie's house, was an old red truck. Not falling apart, but also not a little sports car, it was exactly what I liked.

"Thanks Dad. It's perfect." I couldn't keep the smile off my face. It was perfect. No having to drive the police cruiser. No being stranded with out a car when Charlie was at work.

"I assume Lola wasn't lying when she said you have your license. We will have to get you a Washington license, but…" Charlie was babbling, but, still, all I could do was smile.

* * *

That night, I realised just how much Charlie and I didn't know each other. Like, he didn't know that I broke my leg last summer and it still sometimes gives me a hard time. And, I hadn't known that he can absolutley NOT cook. As in, he's a fire hazard. And I am so not into sports... yet Charlie can sit in front of the T.V. watching a ball game for hours. There is just so much catching up to do. Thankfully, it seems like we have a couple years to make that up...

_I am the girl who has never really known her father._


	4. The Klutzy Girl

_**I Am**_

_**I Am The Klutzy Girl**_

I had arrived on a Saturday, which Renee and Phil had said was to give me optimal time to adjust before school started back up for the fall. But I knew better. I knew they just wanted me gone as quickly as they could. Not that I was complaining. School started in a week and a half and my wardrobe needed some serious updating. See, here's the thing about Forks: it is rainy and COLD. Pretty much all the time. No lie. I'm not exaggerating. So, all of my shorts and tank tops weren't going to cut it here in Forks. So, after spending a quiet, lazy weekend around the house with Charlie, Monday I decided to go shopping.

As I had been forewarned, Charlie was not home when I got down the stairs that morning. He had left earlier and would be home around five. Even though I was a big girl and Charlie had told me I could do whatever I wanted, I jotted a quick note down to Charlie, telling him I was going to Port Angles to do some shopping. With that done, I grabbed an apple and headed out the door, not bothering to lock it behind me. Charlie had informed me that in this small town, nobody locked their doors because they could all trust each other. It seems a little strange to me, but, hey, whatever floats their boat.

The ride to Port Angles wasn't that long, at least, not as long as I had expected. My new truck was nice. It was a few years old, five years tops. It didn't go as fast as some people would have liked, but I liked staying close to the speed limit anyways. It was perfect for me.

When I reached the mall, the parking lot was fairly crowded, but with luck, I managed to pull up behind a car in the front of the lot just as they were pulling out. This day was turning out pretty okay so far. As I walked into the first department store, I realized why it was crowded. The sales were huge. It was an early bird sale, so by the time I got there, most of the people were done shopping. Walking over into juniors, I quickly was beginning to realize that styles here and styles in Pheonix were completely different. I mean, it makes sense when you think about it. The weather was completely different. And, even though things were different, I quickly realized I liked the style anyway.

I browsed the racks, pulling clothing randomly, not watching where I was going. So, being my klutzy self, I was not surprised to find myself running into someone. "Oh!"

"Oh my gosh! I am sooooo sorry! Are you okay?" I asked frantically as I stared at the pixy in front of me. The girl was beautiful, in an almost inhuman way. When I had run into her, she hadn't even budged, as if I didn't affect her. She was ice cold, like she had been standing around outside without her jacket off. She was bouncing from foot to foot, a grin stretched across her face.

"Not a problem." The girl said as she continued with her bouncing. "Hi, I'm Alice Cullen. Nice to meet you." She girl held out her hand, which I took shyly. I noticed that it was just as hard and cold as I had realized when I had run into her.

"Isabella Swan, but everybody calls me Bella." I mumbled. My whole life I had been an extremely shy, quiet girl, and this girl, Alice, was so completely the opposite it was slightly nerve wracking.

"We are going to be the best of friends, I just know it!" Alice exclaimed as she looped her arm through mine. I blinked in surprise. I had just met this girl. And yet, I was sure that we would be very close. She seemed like a great person. Not only that, but she went to my new school. Maybe, starting out the year with a friend would make things easier. As Alice steered me around the store, helping me pick out clothes, I realized how desperately I was in need of a friend.

Hours latter, I was loading up my truck with my bags and promising to call Alice latter when I was home. This strange, illuminating girl had decided to become friends with me, and there was nothing I could do about it. Not that I wanted to. I was now positive we would be the best of friends.

"Okay, Bella, now PLEASE don't forget to call me when you get home. I want to be able to come over and help you unpack and stuff. It is going to be so much fun. Then maybe we could go do something this afternoon. That would be sooooo much fun! And we can pick out your outfit for the first day of school, and…" I laughed, cutting Alice off mid-sentence.

"Alice, Alice, I got it. I'll call you when I get home. I just need to stop a couple more places first and then I will be on my way. Don't worry." I couldn't help chuckling.

"Well, I'm sorry. It's just been a while since I have had a girl to hang out with Rosalie and Esme." Alice pouted. I nodded. Alice had filled me in on her family, about how her and her brothers and sisters were adopted and such. So, with that said and one final goodbye, I was off, heading for the bookstore. This had been a great start to the day and I was looking foreword to spending more time with my new friend.

_I am the klutzy girl._

_A/N: I'm back! Yay! Thanks to all of you for reviewing. Please continue to do so! _


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